Sunday 28 November 2010

Train porn

Unstoppable is completely absurd and grippingly wonderful.


Starring Denzel Washington and Chris Pine, it's the story of a runaway train.


Like much-parodied 1970s disaster movies, there's also a trainload of unbearably cute kids in harm's way, plus a couple of innocent and rather pretty horses.


Surely the horses can't come to any harm...?

There are the now-traditional rooms full of people shouting at each other, and the corporate big-wigs are both inept and rude.


This is a film about Working Class Heroes except, obviously, the guy who screwed-up in the first place. He's just an idiot. But then, he's also very fat, so obviously he isn't a Working Class Hero: he just isn't pretty enough. Washington and Pine, who are, play uneasy colleagues, who grow to respect each other as the film progresses until, at the end, they are so close they're practically a married couple.


We don't care, because the only thing concerning us is the momentum of the runaway train, and the destruction it threatens to wreak on our two heroes' interestingly dysfunctional families (Pine's character is presented to us as if his only fault is that he loves his wife just too much...).


It's gripping and thrilling and enormous fun, especially if you have even a vague enthusiasm for trains (I am assuming you do: I mean, what on earth are you doing on this blog if you don't like trains?).


Chris Pine made the recent Star Trek reboot sing. Even though his forehead is way too big, he looked mighty fine in tighty-whities (something he very briefly shows us again, in this film. He is clearly not a boxers man):


Denzel is Denzel, reprising his role from The Taking of Pelham 1-2-3, a film which was much-derided when I reviewed it on here. But Unstoppable is unbeatable fun.


PS: In case you were wondering, this film is, bizarrely, apparently based (albeit loosely) on true-ish events. In 2001 a General Motors SD40, number 8888, belonging to CSX Transportation, with more than 40 wagons careered driverless for two hours through the state of Ohio at speeds of up to 45mph.


The runaway train was ultimately stopped by another locomotive coupling onto the rear, which slowed it enough for a waiting driver to leap on and bring it to a halt.


A Google search for "CSX 8888" will tell you more than you probably want to know. Somehow, the (albeit distant) relationship to reality makes Unstoppable seem even more enjoyable.

3 comments:

Stewart Jackel said...

And also based on 'Speed' (1994)?
Much more fun locally was a runaway suburban train that just ran downhill. :-) See: http://www.atsb.gov.au/publications/investigation_reports/2003/rair/rair2003001.aspx
But to more important (ie Mr Pine's) bits. Aren't you supposed to take your jocks off before you copulate? But I do like the tantalising nature of the pointy hint. Yum.

Niall said...

I saw the trailer for this and thought is looked lame, but if you say otherwise...
Seems weird that that rail system in the doesn't use dead man controls or AWS systems though. Sounds unsafe to me.

LeDuc said...

The rail system does use dead man's handles, but it's not as simple as that: locomotives (and their trains) have multiple systems and, as locos have got more complicated, so has the interaction of those systems.

In this case (although I may have this completely wrong, not being an engineering geek), the loco can use its engine power to brake (on an electric train this would be the equivalent of regenerative braking). But somehow the driver confused the sequence necessary to engage the engine brakes and, instead, applied the throttle to accelerating the train. In the few seconds it took for the huge mass to start speeding up, he had left the cab thinking he had applied the brakes. When he realised his mistake it was too late.

Other systems were not connected -- such as the air brakes, which do operate automatically if red signals are passed and the override is not activated. But that is normal when shunting freight trains.

In the case of the real life event on which this story is based, it was an entire sequence of human error and mistakes which each had to be done in that particular order for this to occur. The fact that there are so few train runaways supports the idea that the failsafe systems on trains are largely effective.

Is this film "lame"? Really, I am shocked -- I have never seen a film about trains which is lame. But this one is actually rather thrilling. You have to go into it knowing it's going to be a load of old tosh, of course, and offer yourself up to the rollercoaster ride of thrills to follow. In that spirit, it's hugely enjoyable entertainment. With lots of great train shots!